If you are here meeting me for the first time, you may not know that I don’t like girly shit. You might, at first glance, look and me and say, but you wear makeup! And get your nails done! You have long hair. You wear skirts and tight, body-accentuating clothing. You are a girl, Meghan. Fair. But not a normal one.
Now, in retrospect, I can see why I was so drawn to feminism from a young age. I was, as they say (and not in a nice way), not like the other girls. I never wanted to be a mother, to get married, to live a traditional life. I wanted to be me more than I wanted to get along or fit in. I didn’t like pink, frilly things so much as I liked old band t-shirts and chucks. I got along with men, often, better than I got along with women, who I felt always expected me to play nice, not to make rude jokes, not to say what I really thought, to lie in order to avoid offending… Not to be myself, in other words.
This all seemed to come naturally to some girls. Others, I felt were playing a role — choosing marriage and kids because they felt they should, not because they really wanted to. I had trouble believing any woman genuinely wanted that life. Who would choose no fun and a life of dull submission over a life of freedom?
I know now that I was wrong about a lot of things. Namely, femininity and masculinity are not all “nurture” — much of what we call “gender” is in fact rooted in “nature”: evolution and biology. Though of course there are outliers, and feminism has had a great role in allowing those outliers to thrive, as well as allowed greater freedom for women in marriages and as mothers. Lots of women do seem to “have it all,” as it were: fulfilling lives, careers, adventure, love, and kids. Some women are happy to be mothers and wives, primarily — and love the life I assumed no one could possibly really want. Some women move to Mexico to live joyfully among the dogs, and burp and swear and drink moonshine in bars, walking home to rooster sounds.
I have arrived at the conclusion that not everyone is like me, not everyone wants what I want, and not everyone enjoys what I enjoy. It’s tough to see that your way is not the best way, when you really do like your way.
Having come to that realization, imagine my displeasure at encountering the supposedly heterodox embracing the notion that women who don’t follow the conventional path are deeply sad and bad individuals, not only doing it wrong, but to blame for most of society’s current ills, including embrace of the trans trend.
Not only should all women marry and have kids young (honestly, I think this is decent advice if you do want to get married and have kids… waiting too long may well end in deep disappointment…), but those who fail to do so will end up not only miserable, lonely, and bitter, but projecting their never-fulfilled womb onto autogynephiles we have confused as victims in need of nurturing.
The analysis goes something like this, as per Jordan Peterson and some others (I’m going to try my best to be fair here, so please do feel free to let me know in the comments if I’m missing something):
“The maternal instinct is both very powerful and the defining characteristic of femininity — what happens when women enter the political arena and that instinct doesn’t find its proper place?”
“The answer is this,” Peterson says, “childless women infantilize everything.”
So the concern is that childless woman have nowhere suitable to place their empathy and desire to nurture (the suitable place being a child), so take direction from society or institutions, which tell them the victim in need of nurturing is a large, ugly man in a dress or perhaps a terrorist group. We infantilize these men and groups because we don’t have a real infant to nurture.
“Childlessness creates an untapped reservoir of empathy, hypergamy selects the ideology that determines which group/people receive that empathy,” Wokal Distance explains.
“In other words, people looking to compassionate need someone to be compassionate towards. With no kids around, compassionate people (mostly women) look for people [and] groups to give their compassion to. Then they outsource the selection process for who gets that compassion...”
He argues that this outsourcing is handed over to “people in prestigious areas of society (elite cultural, academic, and social institutions),” who tell them to empathize with those “woke ideology says are ‘oppressed.’”
Having been told, for example, that Palestinians (ergo Hamas) are oppressed by Israel, many young women in particular have chosen to “side with Hamas,” he says.
This analysis makes a lot sense in some ways and less sense in others.
In part because this is not what I’ve observed in my real life, which includes numerous men on the “Free Palestine” bent (as well as many moms), and plenty of childless women who have opted not to rally around jihadis who would maybe stone them to death for “immoral behaviour.”
More recently, Peterson shared a video on X showing a man telling a woman that a woman is “not clearly defined,” before going on to explain that a woman is in fact defined not by biological sex but by the often sexist gender stereotypes we call “femininity.”
Peterson adds, “All narcissists shield themselves in the cloak of victimhood” (true). “The undiscerning cannot tell the difference between the infant and the predator hence the attractiveness of the victim/narcissist to (childless) women” (not true).
In my experience, the people who don’t ascertain who is a narcissist and should therefore be avoided are:
1) Men
2) Naive women and women who’ve yet to be in a relationship with a narcissist.
The reasons for this are simple: one does not tend to recognize narcissism unless one has had the unfortunate experience of having suffered at the hands of a narcissist. I did not know what narcissism was until I was in an abusive relationship with a narcissist. This is how most women come to understand and suss out narcissists, and why so many men just… don’t see it.
We observe this all the time in situations of abuse, where a woman goes, “This guy is abusive” and her boyfriend or some male acquaintance says, “What? He seems fine to me?” (As in, I’ve never seen him punch anyone in the face what’s your problem?)
Those red flags are generally learned the hard way. Plenty of women don’t see the flags (myself included, obviously and at some points, as I fell into relationships with more than one of these guys) as well, but I find it is much more common that women clock abusive, narcisstic men whereas men clock nothing at all. This makes sense, because men are far less likely to be victims of these guys, so why would they need to be on guard or have learned to avoid these types?
Beyond all that, I am the most childless person I know, and have yet to embrace narcissistic men playing at womanhood literally or figuratively. Maybe it’s just me, or maybe it’s also legions of untraditional women who for decades fought transanity when no one else saw it and while many a man told them to “just be nice” and could not understand why these radical feminists were getting all hysterical about a few silly men who wanted to wear dresses.
I don’t wish to play man vs woman here, because pointing fingers is not commonly known as the best way to get anywhere productive, but the finger has been pointed at me, and the finger is wrong, so I feel a little backed into a corner.
If one were to think about this rationally, one might think:
1) Radical feminists — probably the least feminine of all women, and those who mounted the most fierce arguments against marriage, motherhood, and traditional femininity — were the first in the trenches, battling the men claiming to be women long before anyone else, and have held the line ever since. Many of these women are lesbians and separatists, though of course not all, and therefore likely to be childless. Why would these women have been at the forefront of the battle against transanity if this “childless women” theory were true?
2) The most likely to exhibit and have embraced feminine stereotypes such as empathy, nurturing, risk-avoidance, selflessness, a desire to avoid conflict and get along, agreeableness, passivity, and submissiveness are mothers and wives. This is because these traits accomodate a successful marriage and family life. Being selfish, difficult, rude, risk-taking, non-nurturing, assertive, averse to going along, committed to living one’s authentic life over all else and failing to prioritize “getting along,” are not exactly the typical qualities that lead to long marriages and calm family lives.
This is probably why I’m not a wife or a mother: because I want to be myself and do what I want and the idea of having to push my freedom and true self and interests aside to accomodate others, for years on end, feels like a prison sentence to me. (I also think dogs are cuter than babies?)
The entire reason I am known as Canada’s First Terf-lady is because I am an unconventional, difficult woman. It’s because I rejected traditional femininity and chose a rather “masculine” path that I fought back against gender identity ideology in Canada, almost alone, for so long.
According to many of my heterodox brethren I should have felt the emptiness in my womb and projected that onto Jessica Yaniv instead of calling him “he” and getting kicked off of Twitter for four years.
To my mind, it is the motherly, wifely type who is much more susceptible to staying quiet and avoiding angering her neighbours and friends by pointing out that there is no such thing as a female penis, though it’s clear there is no real binary here, as many mothers, like the famed Kellie-Jay and
and our and of course J.K. herself, have headed up this battle at their own great risk for years.To me, this feels like yet another lazy attempt to blame women (and their attempts at liberation) for their own apparent demise. Return to femininity, you genderless heathens! is the message I’m getting far too often from the non-orthodox, of late.
Which brings me to sundresses, which I hate.
Yes, I know. Men like them. They’ve told me many times! The thing is, again, I am a genderless heathen so I don’t care. This dress is ugly as fuck and I’m not wearing it.
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