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Marnie's avatar

I used to ride the bus in Vancouver as well. It was a long time ago, but I remember one night coming back from my Denny's waitress job in Richmond and getting off on Granville and 57th. It was about 10pm in June, so not that long after sunset. A guy followed me off the bus and somehow raced ahead of me. I didn't realize this until I noticed him standing in the middle of someone's lawn jerking himself off, staring right at me, only ten feet away. Of course, I ran for my life.

I think this led to me quitting my waitress job shortly afterward.

I also know the bus route along Hastings that you must be talking about.

As an engineer, there are many times when I've been alone in a lab late at night with only a few people around. In my field of engineering, there is only one woman for every 10 men. Most of the time, this has been fine, but there have been times working for a small company when I have not felt safe. There have been several times where male engineer coworkers have stood very close to me within a few inches near my lab setup or desk. It's a behavior that is hard to describe. There's definitely a territorial aspect to it. Mostly people, like Jessica Valenti, would say what's the big deal? you can just walk away. He just has a thing for you. He's a nice person, just a little weird. Etc.

In general, I have walked away from these situations. But I've also left professional positions because of these situations.

Comments like those of Jessica Valenti silence women and force women to leave jobs and make it difficult for women to use public transportation and public facilities such as restrooms.

Just tonight, I went out to move my car to a better parking spot here in San Francisco. I ran into my neighbor who is Asian. She told me that her car window had been smashed out the night before and that one of the homeless people that lives at the end of our street had jumped out and threatened her when she was parking her car a few nights ago. We talked for a while. She told me that she was angry and afraid. She doesn't go out after dark now.

I am tired of people such as Jessica Valenti, who likely works on a laptop in a protected space, telling less protected women to clam up and walk away.

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Paul Kramer's avatar

If a man gets out of line with a woman, it's up to any man that's standing by to intervene and take care of the situation by protecting the woman. You do whatever it takes to neutralize the threat. Even if it means knocking the creep cold.

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