Gene McConnell is an ex-john. At one time in his life, he had a porn addiction, was paying for sex regularly (while married), and even attempted to sexually assault a woman. Gene stopped himself, but the near-attempt and consequent arrest forced him down another path, towards dealing with his past trauma and related sex, anger, and emotional issues, as well as towards a life of talking to other men about his past, how he changed his life, and what was at the root of his exploitative behaviour and dehumanizing view of women. Today, he tours college campuses, speaking to young men about pornography and prostitution, is the founder of Authentic Relationships International, is a youth pastor, and is married with three children.
I found Gene through a documentary film produced by Exodus Cry called Buying Her. He is featured in the film among a number of ex-johns who speak candidly about what they did to women in the sex trade, why, and how it impacted their life and the lives of others.
In this episode, we talk about why he began paying for sex, why he stopped, and what he learned.